A friend posted this to an e-group we both read. You may have already seen it, but it's worth passing along:
May peace break into your house and may thieves come to steal your debts!
May the pockets of your jeans become a magnet for $100 bills!
May love stick to your face like Vaseline and may laughter assault your lips!
May your clothes smell of success like smoking tires!
May happiness slap you across the face!
May your tears be that of joy and good health fall on you like a ton of bricks!
May the problems you had forget your home address!